It’s tough to be a reindeer
Okay, it’s not all about Santa you know. Us reindeers have to work really hard all the year round to make sure that the sleigh gets up there in the sky. He’s a big guy old Santa and it takes a lot of muscle to keep up the speed as we pull the sleigh, toys for several million kids and the bulky guy himself all around the world.
We have a fitness instructor who’s actually related to Coach Shane. Shane likes the sun but great great grandpa Blane came out to the snowy North Pole many many years ago ‘cause he couldn’t stand the heat. So he did not (as Sunset Cove history documented) die in the Second Sunset War.
Blane changed the way that reindeer are perceived by people today. Before he came along we were fed oats and water and just allowed to run loose in the fields behind the ice palace.
Blane taught us the importance of saunas, mixing our diet and playing ice hockey and volleyball as much as possible. He also convinced Santa to build a gym behind the swimming pool area and made sure that the elves sewed some decent tracksuits for us to wear when we’re working out.
The reindeer games were invented and Blane trained the winning team, led by my good self. That was how the gang that pull the sleigh got chosen in the first place. Before that Santa just used to call on any old deer to help him out over Christmas and things sometimes went really wrong.
Like the time Santa and his deer crashed in the Andes and had to eat the wrapping paper to stay alive. That was the year that kids all over the world thought that they had been really bad ‘cause Santa never showed up and they grew up with major chips on their shoulders and became non-believers. What a nightmare that was. And all because those dumb deer didn’t know their left from their right or their up from their down.”