COACH SHANE’S GUIDE TO EASTER 1

COACH SHANE’S GUIDE TO EASTER

“Hey there, I’m Coach Shane and I’d like to take the time to tell you all about my childhood Easter experiences in Sunset Cove…”

Easter in Sunset Cove

As you’ll know from Mr Fluffy Muffin, Easter in Sunset Cove is a week long celebration which makes it understandble why Sunset Cove is in the record books for consuming almost a 1/4 of the world’s easter eggs each year.

When I was younger my family lived right on the edge of town. Every Sunday we’d drive into Church and meet up with our grandfather on the way.

Our Mum’s father, “Pops”, was senile long before I was born, and only went downhill from there. The worst thing after Church was getting stuck behind Pops on his way home again. He would drive his old 4WD 10 KPH down the middle of the road, completely unaware of our beeping, yelling, or ill-advised attempts at passing him. Blind as a bat in one eye to begin with and deaf from old age, he had no business being behind the wheel of ANYthing.

But my first memories of Easter were when I was 4 years old. My brother and I woke up on Easter Morning and Pops, all excitedly, told us the Easter bunny had been and pooped out minature eggs all over the garden. We ran out there like we were on fire and started picking them all up. Only after we’d eaten a few did Pops tell us that that’s where our pet goat had slept last night.

I don’t think he realised himself what the implications of this was because he was eating the rotten little brown things too. But, hey, I was only 4 and he was of course 94.

In later years I remember the great Sunset Cove Downhill Egg Race. We’d entered every year and never won. But that year in ’83 Pops had a great idea. He gave us a little piece of blu-tack that we stuck between our egg and the spoon. And while we were running down hill as fast as our legs would carry us, Pops was tripping up the other kids and making them land face first in their eggs.

We raced over the finish line and got handed over our years supply of chocolate eggs. Then we piled them on the back of Pop’s pick up and sat on the back watching the long line of traffic behind us as we stuffed our faces with chocolate.

The next year I was teaching other kids how to cheat, look good and get away with it.

I always like to win now, especially if I look good doing it. I guess that’s why I became a Coach.