“Josh and Octavia here. We’ve convened at a secret location to discuss tactics in stealth. Apparently this will be a self-conducted interview, as we were invited to this location with very specific instructions from a mysterious organization called “Cloud 9.”



OCTAVIA – Hello, Josh. I must say I’m a bit suspicious of these circumstances.

JOSH – Seems perfectly normal to me.

OCTAVIA – That’s what scares me. Do you know what agency this “Cloud 9” works for?

JOSH – No. But they say every Cloud has it’s Silver Lining, heh. ….No? Alright. Stealth. What does it mean to me?

OCTAVIA – –As an ordinary 16-year-old girl, I have never had a need to be particularly secretive. I find that many of my petty problems are solved with a dose of good old-fashioned honesty.

But, if I did come across a matter requiring extraordinary discretion, I would take the following precautions:

a) Distance the matter from myself by all possible means, so that if anything went wrong, nothing would trace back to me.

b) Never discuss the matter outloud in a public place where I might be overheard, or in a private building that might be tapped. Never use sign-language or lip-reading or other visual means of communication that might be seen or recorded by the G2QRL High-Definition Satellite Cameras. Especially never share information in writing. In fact, the best modus operandi is to never communicate. Ever. If communication becomes absolutely necessary, direct brain-to-brain telepathic connection is the only secure line.

c) Don’t pet the dog.

JOSH – I’m going to have to disagree with the lovely Octavia on this point. I find that a good scratch on a mongrel head now and then keeps the canine populations from tearing my pretty pink tights. –I mean— The pretty pink tights I bought for my mother. As a gift. To be nice.

OCTAVIA – For those who choose a life of stealth, it is important to remember that stealth is a 24-hour job. Don’t let your guard down, even for an instant. You cannot wait until you’ve had your morning coffee to put your stealth on. Nor can you take it off and divulge privileged information just to impress a date.
No, friends, you must eat, drink, and breathe secrecy. Even while you sleep, you must be ever vigilant.

Next page