So I threw away my beedly boppers and tried to forget about them and about what the Rev.Hill had said.
After a few years people stopped calling the military when I walked about town and just went back to pointing at my ears and calling me weirdo. That was okay with me.
After a few more years I found something that made me dance again so I was happy. Eating mashed potato makes it hard to dance but man, when you feel the rhythm you just can’t stop those happy feet tapping away!
Well, my life changed when the Great Potato Famine hit Sunset Cove and I had to go on rations. My happy feet had to be put away again when all potatoes had been eaten and there were no more left for anyone, not even the Montana family who could pretty much buy anything they wanted.
I was out shopping one afternoon to try to find something else that got my rhythms going and something caught my eye. Something spangly, something sparkly, something zoingy…BEEDLY BOPPERS!!!!
I waltzed my way down aisle 7 past the custard powder and the gravy granules and I tangoed past the TV dinner freezers and salsa’d my way outside and my legs just carried me faster and faster (one step together two step together) towards that beautiful sight of …
Mrs Miggins and the Rev.Hill. Wearing beedly boppers on their heads. Purple and yellow zebras. And giant sunflowers.
What was going on? Nobody screamed, nobody shouted to dive for cover as the aliens attacked, nobody shoved cotton wool in their ears so their brains wouldn’t get sucked out.
People turned and pointed and admired those beedly boppers!
Soon the whole of Sunset Cove was alive with the sparkles of the beedly boppers and everyone was wearing them!
Soon the craze spread to the rest of the world and kids, adults and grannies were wearing their favourite pair of beedly boppers whenever they could!
I held back as long as I could in case it was some crazy joke they were playing on me but then I got the shakes and the shivers and I couldn’t stop myself and I went home to my cupboard and made myself the biggest, spangliest pair of beedly boppers anyone had ever seen.
I was the local celebrity after that. Everyone wanted to be my friend and everyone wanted me to make them a pair as amazing as mine. I was on the news and I was guest of honour at the greyhound races – they got me to tango round the track as the dogs tried to get my bunny beedly boppers – good thing I’m so tall, those dogs never stood a chance.
After a while the craze died down and people moved on to other things. Leg warmers and pixie boots, rara skirts and lace gloves. I went back to my normal life and stopped being given free enchiladas at the Princess Diner. But I still wore my beedly boppers with pride and I still danced when the rhythm hit me.
Well, the years have passed and I am in love. I always liked the look of Jet but you know when I knew for the first time that I loved her, really loved her? When I saw her at Octavia’s party – she was wearing beedly boppers!